Alright now boys and girls we've got another story for you now! 好了，现在男孩和女孩，我们已经有了另外一个故事给你吧！

We want to introduce to you another friend of the Bible! 我们要介绍给大家的圣经另一位朋友！

   

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

   

If I were God there would be no explicit sex on T.V. 如果我是上帝，就没有明确的性别上电视

Like little Opie eating pie when he made it with Aunt Bea 像小欧派吃派时，他与姑姑衣使它

   

If I were God thou shall not worship false Billy Idols 如果我是你的神必不拜假比利偶像

And thou shall add the Book Of Flavor Flav to the Bible 而你要味道黄添加书圣经

Thou shall make fun of Hindus thou shall not make a "Speed 2" 你应当印度教徒的乐趣你不得作出了“生死时速2 ”

If I were God that's what I'd do Heavens no 如果我是上帝，这就是我想要做的老天爷不

   

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

   

If I were God I'd get a bunch of slaves to do everything 如果我是上帝，我会得到一堆奴隶做的一切

Norwegian lesbians that feed me grapes and know how to sing 那给我吃的葡萄，知道怎么唱挪威女同性恋

   

If I were God thou shall not wear tube socks with Flip-Flops 如果我是你的神必不穿筒袜与触发器

Thou shall sit and thou shall spin thou shall even wife swap 你应该坐下来，你会旋转你也必换妻

Thou shall resist the Olsen Twins, thou shall not cut "Footloose" 你应抵制奥尔森双胞胎，你不砍“浑身是劲”

If I were God that's what I'd do, Heavens no 如果我是上帝，就是我想要做的，谢天没有

   

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

Hell yeah 地狱啊

   

And when they nail my pimpled ass to the cross 而当他们钉我的小突起的屁股在十字架上

I'll tell them I found Jesus that should throw them off 我会告诉他们我发现耶稣应该把他们关

He goes by the name Jesus and steals hubcaps from cars 他去了耶稣的名字，并断球，从汽车轮毂罩

Oh Jesus can I borrow your crowbar? 哦，耶稣，我可以借你的撬棍？

To pry these God damn nails out they're beginning to hurt 窥探这些该死的钉子出来他们开始疼

Crucified and all I got was this lousy T-shirt 钉在十字架上，所有我得到了这个糟糕的T恤

"I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!" I'll sing as I'm flogged “我不能相信这不是黄油！ ”我会唱歌，我鞭打

Yeah that's what I would do if I were God 是啊，这就是我会做，如果我是上帝

So vote for me for Savior and you'll go to Heaven 所以投票给我的救主，你会去天堂

Your lame duck Lord is like Kevin Spacey in "Seven" 您的跛脚鸭主是像凯文·史派西在“七宗罪”

With creepy threats of H-E-Double-Hockey-Stick 用H -E -双曲棍球棒的令人毛骨悚然的威胁

You just can't teach an old God new tricks 你不能教一个老神新花样

But would I be a good Messiah with my low self-esteem? 不过，我会是一个很好的弥赛亚与我的自卑？

If I don't believe in myself would that be blasphemy? 如果我不相信自己会是这样亵渎？

Just sport some crummy "holier than thou" facade 只是炫耀一些照出“比你圣洁”门面

Yeah that's what I would do if I were God 是啊，这就是我会做，如果我是上帝